My Year in View with The Crew! at OneTrueMedia.com

Well... what a year its been... lots of laughs along the way. Merry Christmas to a fantastic bunch of ladies! Here's to 2011!

Photo and video editing at www.OneTrueMedia.com

PV Crew Chrimbo Cracker... at Port Vale FC! (part 1)

Well another great weekend with the girls.

Friday. Chez Pearce.Arrived in Liverpool bang on time, thanks Ryanair! Had me jeans on with a fancy-pants pair of heels... Cary looked at me shocked as I come teetering across the road in em!! After my explaination she understands - no room in my bag for big heels - well not if I wanted to get the Mickey Finns in! AHA! Good plan, Stan....

Nice chilled out afternoon, pop down to the shops to get a few bits, spot of lunch in Subway (official food of the PV Crew!) where I get a case of Subway Tourettes...nightmare! We then nip round to Mand's for a brew... Back at Cary's she cooks up a fine feast for dinner - Curry night with all the trimmings. YUM! A few glasses of vino, followed by a few Voddies, followed by a few Cock-Sucking Cowboys! Well we were pacing ourselves!
So much for our early night, after putting the world to rights, watching an OLD OLD Interview of Rob being back home in Burslem, we pick out the landmarks where we've been and laugh as Rob is on the pitch at Port Vale... telling Cary I bet she will be on there tomorrow night she chuckles! Bit of Electric Proms, big screen lickable... LOVELY! Then some random chat about Phoenix Nights taglines, Max & Paddy (Paddy & Max) and misheard lyrics where we google one thing and end up with the complete opposite! (yes it WAS rude!)

Fast forward - well only a few hours later mind - to Saturday morning. Cary heads to the hairdressers for a spruce of her do (not that it needed it!) I'm up and about where Mal puts on a bacon butty and a brew - thanks Mal!
Cary returns looking fab and offers me some orange wee - AKA Berocca... Keeps us going for the day of course and we're in fine form. Cary goes to collect Mand, gathering a few bits and bobs together and then Ash arrives to drive us to Stoke.

When we get to Stoke, we have a rendezvous at Subway... (see, told you its the OFFICIAL food lol) where we find Lou and Shelley already chilling after a nice sub! Cue lots of hugs... Paula is in touch - her train has been cancelled. WTFoof Board!
However the is another due very soon and shes only around 15-20mins behind schedule... not so bad after all.
Subway munched - we head to the hotel next door for a swift half in the bar... Debs joins us not long after (cue more hugs...) and then last but by no means least Paula!! yay!! We're all ready for the off so we hit the road and make like a banana and split.

On our way to Burslem and Tunstall.... The glamour that is the George hotel... 
Now we love the George hotel, I've said this before its a bit Fawlty Towers but its OUR Fawlty Towers! Getting checked in and sorting the rooms, the girls convene in the bar (where else) for a glass or two of vino.
Once we get our keys, we head up to sort out our Secret Santa's. We get the booze out, Mand has the novel idea of bringing a BOX of vino (good girl!) so along with the Voddy, bottles of Magners, Bulmers, Baileys, Rose and Mickey Finns we crack open the box!
The next hour is spent swapping cards, presents, goodie bags and of course the annual PV Crew Secret Santa! Gotta love it!

Checking the time, we try and cram in a quickie in the Red Lion. Well its tradition at this stage, wouldn't be a visit to Burslem without a trip over. So we do, but we are on a mission to ensure we get back for the taxis. We head into the pub and the barman from June is still there - laughing his head off as we walk in with boas and halos! The rest of the customers arent sure what to make of us! Lots of laughter and banter for the next 45mins... and a quick beverage before we head back to the George to get ready. As usual we stop traffic crossing over and get lots of beeping horns and shouting - well they're not used to 8 angels crossing the road! I order two taxis to collect us at 7.15 and of course at 7.25 we head downstairs to find the taxis have buggered orf! I call them back and ask em to send a minibus - the minibus arrives and In true PV Crew style, we cram 8 into a 6 seater... well its only up't road!

Arriving at Port Vale its like we are coming home. The girls who hadn't been before were not sure what to expect, so Lou, Paula, Debs and I lead the way up the stairs to the Executive Suite for the festivities. The door staff inform me we are on table 6 so imagine the face of the old guy on table 6 when we bound over towards him! pmsl!! I think his missus had a heart attack at that point!
I quickly find out we are actually on table 4 and we take our seats, start a kitty and get settled.
The food starts to arrive and as usual there is plenty of it and its great quality. We spot Keith across the room and we give a hollar - he heads over to acquaint himself with the new (and old) PV visitors. The night starts well by him calling us his special VIPs and continues much along that vein when we are treated like royality! But more about that in part 2!!

PV Crew Chrimbo Cracker... at Port Vale FC! (part 2)

So we are all sat around table 4. Vino and other drinks are flowing. Getting stuck into the grub, we find that its as tasty and yummy as before. I drop the salt cellar, which knocks my Magners into my dinner. WHOOPS! 5 second rule applies, and as Debs passes me a clean plate I salvage the turkey, roasties and the pigs in blanket (within 5 seconds!) Lucky theres enough veg and spuds on the table to fill the most hungry vegetarian so I'm sorted!
Running out of Cranberry and Gravy, the staff are quick to come and top us up... they are so lovely at the Vale and nothing is too much trouble. In fact, when Shelley hints that she would like a Yorkie, I ask Keith are there any spare and he heads into the kitchen before returning with 2 of em!!


How we managed to fit in dessert after the starters and all the food I'll never know but we did... and Debs and I made a run for the Spys (minus the coffee) which were munched throughout the night! We managed to get Keith to stick Rob on the tellybox for us - with Wand Erection and lots of cheers at the end of the performance around the function room - but mostly from table 4 ;)
DJ throws on a few tunes and Abba are getting ready - Keith comes over to ask us do we want the tour... well it would be rude not to!


So 1st stop - the trophy room and the Directors Lounge. A few more trophies and a bit more crystal in the cabinet since last time! Keith always gives us the low down and stops for a few piccies too!

Next stop - THE SEAT! We head into the stand and Keith throws on the floodlights! In the Directors seating area we plonk our backsides on Robbie's seat... More pictures and madness... the poor seat, I can only use one word here - VIOLATED! The seat has never seen so much action, the Laydees convene one by one to take their pew... the throne as it was called a couple of times that night!!

It's all action as the Crew take to the stands...
Keith thinks it hilarious, he can't believe the antics... well wait a minute...
This is the PV Crew... we are on hallowed turf, back home....
He then rephrases and says he can believe it! He wouldn't expect anything else infact!
He takes our antics in great spirits though and is happy to give us all the time to "take a load off" and plonk our arses in Rob's seat!
Wonder if the Crew will get to a match when Rob is home at a match... was a discussion that was had over a few shandies ;)

Next stop - THE PITCH! As we make our way along the players tunnel we convene for a team shot. Keith and Nick are happy to oblige as press photographers! Thanks Guys!
We head outside and the cold air hits us. Cast my mind back to the night before at Cary's place where we are watching that DVD documentary of Rob from 1999 and he's mucking about on that pitch! So we brave the cold air and head outside... the groundsman has cleared all the snow which is piled up at the side (no underground heating I bet, they're only League 2 yaknow!) and a ground sheet it placed strategically on the side of the pitch for us to convene on! Well we don't want our heels on the sacred turf!
So we strike a few poses, Shelley gets her legs into places we never realised she could!!! Brilliant!! Lots of laughs as we head inside and pass the Home Team dressing room...

Hang on a minute Keith, we are the Home Team... well I mean we are the PV Crew after all. Taking a minute to consider, he agrees and says "well Rob has been in those baths too so would you like to head in?!?"
ERM of course we would... so he gets his keys back out of his pocket and we head into the dressing room... some of the Crew jump in the baths... Shelley takes some time to get a bit of physio... I move the tac-tics board around... Paula plays with the balls (EASY!!!!) tis good fun!

Thanking Keith for our grand tour, we head back upstairs to the function room where we get another round in. Abba are on stage and we take a few minutes to catch our breath and chill as they get few a couple of slow songs... as they move onto more cheesy songs, we have a little boogie to Dancing Queen, Mamma Mia and Thank You For the Music!
They were OK but they weren't Robbie, were they?? And they were no JK as Robbie either!
As they left the stage, the DJ kicks off and we waste no time in getting our requests in. Robbie. Take That. Bon Jovi. Robbie. Take That. Kings of Leon. Robbie. You get the idea...

Cue lots of dancing, busting moves that MJ would be jealous of!! A few more drinkies and we get the staff involved... Shelley takes a shine to Sam's hat and gets that off him!
Cary takes a shine to Keith's flashing lights and gets them... Keith heads back 2 mins later with some new PV lanyards for us - seeing as I lost my last one tying the PV Crew banner up at Soccer Aid, Wembley I was glad to get a new one! Coming close to locking up time, the DJ plays Rule the World and we take to the floor and have a right good group hug! We're all psyched up for the tour now more than ever and decide we need another drink to calm us down! However the bar is closed :(

Keith says to give him 10 mins to get rid of everyone and we are good for another drink... or two....
Before we can say "lock in" we are getting more drinks and having some choons on to sing to! Mand has a power snooze but soon wakes up and gets her 2nd wind... In his error, Nick gives me a Southern Comfort and Coke for Cary instead of a Southern Comfort and Lemonade... Keith says to take it and Cary decides to waste not, want not....! NICE!
Nick and Keith come and join us as the rest of the staff head home after a long shift - thanks guys for taking great care of us xxx
We're sat round singing, Debs is drumming the table... Keith gets us all a couple of drinks in (thanks Keith) and Nick remembers why he didnt stop late last time pmsl!!
We have a good catch up, Keith says we have to go back before next Christmas and it's something to think about! It really is like going home when we go back to the Potteries... we always get a warm welcome and especially at Port Vale where it all started!

Its about 3.10am and we decide to go back to the hotel... Keith orders 2 taxis for us but upon heading downstairs we find out that the fog has dropped in and the taxis are not too quick to come and collect us. We convene on the main desk in the foyer, which Keith tells us used to be the Customer Service desk in the shopping centre up Hanley duck! Paula and Cary decide to get behind it to give us some "customer service" and a sing song of "9 to 5" starts!
5 more mins and still no sign - so with Keith finishing locking up, Nick gets on the case to chase them and within about 10 mins our chariots await... We bid our goodbyes to the guys and head back to the George where we jump into our PJs and decide to have a few Cocksucking Cowboys before bed.
Lou cranks up the lappy and with the miracle of WI-FI she finds the performances from Take That and Rob that were on TV earlier in the night. What a way to end the night, singing The Flood, downing shots in our jammies and laughing at all the fun we had earlier that evening!
We hit the hay about 5am... and are awake again at around 8.30. Yes we are mad! Well you can't miss The George Brekkie... This time we had juice and glasses!
Fresh tea! and the brekkie wasnt bad either! Lou even got mushrooms pmsl!!
Cary, Shelley and Mand never made it down for food - WTFood board! That WAS a first! Getting packed up is always fun, even though I always give out half of my case I always end up taking more home... thanks so much for my cards, treats and pressies girls! Feather trail has hit the George again... from the reception up the stairs, to each of the rooms and even in the bathroom (dont ask!) They love us though so we always seem to get away with it *snigger*
Making our way downstairs we hand in our keys and the Receptionist asks us where we were till 3.30 as the Night Manager commented on our late arrival... when we say Port Vale she couldnt believe we got a lock in at the footie ground.. her final words were "you girls know how to party!" and she wouldn't be wrong!

We head back to Stoke train station, where one by one we head on our travels back home... but not before lots of hugs and Christmas wishes outside. Mand is straight off for a Subway having missed Brekkie, Shelley gets one for the train and Ash and Cary follow them over the road.

Another cracking weekend girls. Brilliant. The only things missing were the Shads & Rena... but they were there in Spirit...!! Merry Christmas to you all and can't wait for the next one!

Sam does Stamford... and Pantos on Strike with the Pineson!

1st stop - Kriss place. Lovely lunch in Stamford, back to her house to meet her two boys. They were such lovely lads... a credit to you hun x

Had a fab dinner, some vino and decided to head over to the mess with some of the girls for a couple of cheeky ones. In true PV Crew style, we managed to watch Take That on Children in Need, even got some of the blokes to turn the sound UP!!
Back to Kriss gaff with the girls for some more bevvies, shots and a sing song on the Wii. After the girls went home, Kriss and I re-watched CIN, and also Look Back Dont Stare and had a right good catch up. Was a fab night!
Next morning, was treated to a lovely brekkie before heading to Peterborough station to catch the chuff chuff to Manchester.

Arrived in Manchester where Paula was already in the station in the bar and had a drink on order for me - thanks hun! Just what I needed!

After grabbing a few snacks, and a Subway we get the metrolink across town to the hotel. Holiday Inn (Hotel, Motel, Holiday Inn!) on the Quays; lovely hotel with great staff. Loved the upgrade to the Exec level and a comfy room awaited us!
Getting our gladrags on, frocks and all, we decide to have a pint whilst getting ready... checking my facebook I spot a couple of messages from JK and it turns out he is going to Pantos on Strike too.
Head into Manchester, waiting for a taxi we get bored and blag a lift with some other hotel guests... well we were missing out on serious drinking time! Upon arrival in the City, we head over to the Grapes which is a pub round the corner from the theatre (handy) and its owned by Vera from Corrie...!! Bump into JK here and he joins us for a quick drink before heading up to the theatre. We are in the Circle, but near the front of it with a great view. JK down in the Stalls on the opposite side of the theatre. We try and wave but fail miserably lol!
Bag a program and settle down for what has to be the funniest 2 hours I have ever seen. With slap-stick humour and an adult theme, Pantos on Strike was the biggest laugh out loud fest of the year! no wonder Rob went to see it himself!! The story is set in panto-land and Jonny being the king of panto has to rescue the Princess from Evil King Foo (say it backwards lol)
Paddy and Jonny played both their parts so well and worked really well together. The final scene being Paddy and Jonny getting the crowd to sing "Is this the Way to Amarillo" and "Angels" (its too early for Angels!!)  Hilarious!

After the show, we head around to the Stage Door, there are a couple of paps there but Paula and I are not deterred. The lovely Coleen Nolan pops out with her hubby Ray (who was in the band) and stops for a few pics and chats away... she was so lovely and was great as the Fairy Godmother!
A couple of the other stars come out and then out pops Jonny Wilkes and Paddy McGuinness.
Jonny looks a little tired and is quiter than normal (I later find out he was a bit poorly) but still stops to sign my programme and pose for a few pics! Paddy a proper Bolton lad has a chat and a giggle with us both.

JK times it perfectly and appears just as the cameras are out, and Jonny has a chat with him about Stoke! As Paddy gets into his car and Jonny heads off up the street, we decide to head back to the Grapes where we see Coleen and Ray and some of the cast. JK spots Coleen and having sang with JK she invites us over as soon as she spots him. She was a lady... friendly and good for a laugh! Even taking time to have a chat with Paula's mum on the phone! Happy days! Paula and I laugh at meeting Jonny again - hes a lovely bloke and his voice is fantastic.. he doesnt get the kudos he deserves thats a dead cert.

Had a bit of a catch up with JK too which was nice! He's in great form and finds out all the Crew gossip since we saw him in June!
After the Grapes, we head on to another bar where vodka and classic choons are in full flow... heading back to the hotel for some pink fizz, a kebab and a natter about chatting to Coleen, the midget lap-dancer from the show, and the King of Panto that is Jonny Wilkes... lots of laughs revisiting all the laughs we had earlier before heading to bed at 4am-ish. What a great night!!!

The 1st Annual PV Crew Awards....

Well it's nearly time to hook up with the girlies and I for one can't wait!
1st stop is Cary's gaff on Friday. She is being so kind in putting us up, Louise is coming over Friday too and we're hoping for special guest appearances from Ash and Mandy so fingers crossed!

To put a different spin on the meet we are having a Robbie-filled PJ party on Sat night... with lots of food, drinkies and of course Robbie-ness! Before that I've pulled together some of the best bits from the last 4 years and compiled the very 1st Annual PV Crew Awards....
It was tough going through so many good times to pick out specific ones for the nominations but after a lot of too-ing and fro-ing I came up with the final list... 10 categories... many nominees.... but only 1 winner!
It's gonna be mahooosive!

The categories are confirmed....
The nominations are in....but first...

It was so much fun looking at the best bits, there have been so many laughs. There were plenty of stories that kinda started "this one time... (at bandcamp....!)" - You know the drill.
I went through old messages, pictures, blogs, facebook postings. My oh my some of the things that were in there would make your hair curl. From the first proper meet at Port Vale FC to the more recent meeting Pete Conway in Stoke in June... whether "home or away" - hotel, apartment or at one of the girls houses you can hear the laughs for miles! (not to mention the blasting of Robbie Williams and Take That!) Fantastic, Fantastic, Fantastic!

So without further ado, here are the nominees:

Best Picture:
- Kriss for her chicken impression
- Cary for her best Oi Oi cheeky pic
- Sam & Louise for bringing Rena & Debs to Take That; brushing Debs teeth and giving Rena her brekkie!
- Debs with bottle of Stella and her “I don’t drink Stella, me” face!

Best Action / Stunt Move:
- Paula with her head out of the limo at Port Vale (1st time)
- Debs with her dancing on a broken toe / foot at Port Vale (2nd time) after dropping the bikkie tin on it (and thinking it was just sore)
- Kriss & Paula for wrestling in the tunnel at Man Utd.
- Sam on the knob chair… going backwards!

Best Maneuver:
- Sam & Debs setting up their very own PV Karaoke during the lock in at Port Vale, even though there wasn’t one!
- Louise leading the Crew into the “walk thru” Mcdonalds at Wembley; when they were closed
- Ashlea taking no prisoners & getting straight onto JK’s knee in Runcorn

Best Special Guest Appearance:
- Shelley for making it to Stoke despite an impromptu hospital run with her son…
- Debs for managing to bump into us on Wembley Way amidst 75000 people after Take That gig
- The PV Crew for surprising JK in Runcorn
- Rena for when she surprised Nan at Wembley (even though she definitely wasn’t coming!)

Best Newcomer:
- Mandy for getting stuck right in with the Crew and putting us up at the last meet.
- Ashlea for biting the bullet and coming back for seconds!
- Anne-Claire for getting on a plane and getting her ass over the Irish Sea for her very 1st meet!

Best Quotes:
- Cary for Runcorn in general (Chiplash, I’ve got Orange Wee, Call yourself a tribute, Grants for ******s!)
- JK for the classic “Paula's great…every home should have one”
- Louise for “Tidy… Is it…. What’s Occurring” in her finest Welsh accent
- Rena for "the awright mate shop, Marantha, You Plum!"

Best Photography
- Kriss for Soccer Aid and bagging the Rob pics
- Louise for Soccer Aid, Take That and Runcorn
- Shelley for the PV Crew in Stockport with JK

Best “the one where…” moment
- Sam, Lou and Paula picked up a random on the bus after Take That
- Debs when she beat all the local fellas in the sports bar in Wembley at pool, much to their disgust.
- Paula - when The Crew were doing the grape challenge with "Andy" in the Red Lion; Paula then trying to stop Andy eating all the grapes!
- Shelley & Kriss when they tried to get in a “minibus” outside from The George, not realizing there was a limo booked instead that was hiding behind the corner!

Best Use of Unique Lyrics:
- Paula for the Double A Side “Paula’s in a CamperVan / (Den's the) King of the Bongo Bong”
- Sam, Kriss and Louise for their special Burslem Normals version of Good Doctor
- Robbie Williams for singing “You Know Me” to Cary
- Kriss for her classic FB status sing-a-long using Dizzie Rascal's "Bonkers"
- JK for his amazing, unique rendition of “Let Me Entertain You” in Runcorn!

And the Outstanding Contribution Award goes to……find out who on Sat 16th Oct!!

Just popping in to say.... See You Soon!

Plans are coming together nicely for our next get together which is on the 16th October in Manchester.
The swanky apartments are booked...

The surprises have been ordered...
The booze will be nicely chilled....
and we will be ready for the off!
Should be a great weekend. Myself and Louise (with her welsh pounds) will be hot-footing it to Cary's place on Friday and then over to Manchester on Saturday to meet the rest of the Crew!
Although its a while off, we are currently making plans for our Annual Chrimbo Cracker and thinking of heading back to the Vale. The PV Crew goes home... well it's 2 years since our last visit and we are overdue a lock in!
Finally there's talk of us Going for It in Blackpool with JK as Robbie and the One Night of Robbie Williams show in 2011. Yes - we are organised! ;)

So short and sweet blog just to keep you updated... oh and before I go here's a link that I was sent from the Owner & Manager of the Quayside in Runcorn. Apparently they loved us so much they have put us on their website! (and HERE we are!)
See ya later! x

Randoms that Don't Fit into Choonage!

Also found these pearls of wisdom - you gotta larf!


The A to Z of PV Meets

A is for Aeroplane which I am getting on....
B is for Boa, we're gonna have some fun.

C is for Coke to go with the Vodka

D is for Debs, she's rather Dirty, ya.

E is for Experience... The R-W-E

F is for Feathers...go see letter B!
G is for The George, thats where we're gonna stay!

H is for Halo; we're all Angels at play!

I is for Internet; plan our meets, you bet.

J is for Journey...soon we'll all be set.

K is for Keith...he's sometimes known as Steve

L is for LotsOfDrink, if stories are believed!

M is for Miles, how far we gotta travel?
N is Night Out, with the PV rabble!

O is for Outfit, we're gonna look real hot!

P is for Paula, she is Pervy A LOT!!

Q is for Quiet... of course we all are...

R is for Randy...Rena's our little star!
S is for Scrumptious... just me, thats Sam

T is for Tim, he's the singer of the band.

U is for Uproar... we promise we won't cause!
V is for Vale - thats where they kick the balls!

W is for Williams. we like to call him Robbie

X is for X-Rated, perving is our hobby!

Y is for Yarn... there's one we all can tell

Z is for Zany, why we get on so well!

So now you've seen what PV meets
Mean to me, you see
I've gone thru the list
From A, through to Z

Most of all PV meets mean
That good times are ahead.
Staying home? No thanks...
I'm loving PV meets instead!

An Ode to the Crew

Paulas off for a soak
Coz its no joke
The bath made a flood,
The ceilings a Dud
But with PV power
She can still have a shower
So we sent her to a hut,
No we’re not all nuts
For pizza to eat
Coz she deserved a treat!

Rena Rena, she a scream
Busy keepin her house clean
Working hard all day long
Not too busy to hear Robs song.
Likes to chill and have a soak,
Good for the laugh; good for a joke
Partial to the odd voddy
Not so keen on a hot toddy
Don’t call her Randy for nowt
You better watch out when shes about!!!

Dirty Debs is looking fine
She doesn’t really drink much wine
Shes more of a vodka girl
And after a few she’ll give us a twirl.
Loves the footie, a Hammers fan
Her bloke Mickey drives a big van.
Also loving the bloke from Stoke
On facebook she’ll give you a poke
Shes really is a great gal
Another smashing PV pal!

Hello Louise, remember me?
Scmptious from Port Vale you see
I had to write you a song
Coz I know youre at it all day long..
Working all the day and night
Sometimes putting up with shite
But still can smile and have a laugh
You can tell she’s a real Taff(y)
Loving Rob and the Take That lads
In the naked thread, shes really bad!
Louise is cool shes really sound
But doesn’t have many welsh pounds!!


Robbie's Prayer

Our father
Who art in Stoke
Hallow be thy Robbie
Thy Millenium come
Thy Rudebox be done
On earth as it is in Vale.

Give us this day our daily voddy,
And forgive us our pervyiness
As we forgive those that perve against Rob
And lead us not into temptation
For Vale is the kingdom
The "Angel" and the glory
For ever and ever
Tr-ipp-in.

Choonage....

So been having a look thru the archives (of my mind....) and found a few classic Rob hits - with a twist!
See what you think....

"Live Thru A Lens"

Wake up on Saturday morning
You normally feel like yawning
But not this weekend
We're seeing "Live thru a lens"

Crew's just so Saucy; Rena's all Randy,
Got lots of beer in, not drinkin' shandy!
Sam is real scrumptious - she'll have a double measure with friends!
Lou is quite lusty, Debbss is so dirrty
Don't forget Paula; shes just bleedin Pervy
Pleasure at leisure make ours a double measure with friends!

Just because we ain't double barrelled
Don't mean we haven't travelled far
To get to this bar!
Oh no there's quite a queue here
I hope the Voddy will last all night, oh shite!

Wake up on Saturday morning
You normally feel like yawning
But not this weekend
We're seeing "Live Thru a Lens"
And now our families' suspicious
Because we ain't washed the dishes
Still a pile there, well we don't care!

Olympics for lay-dees, good job were not babies!
We're looking real cool, makin' the blokes drool,
All down at Port Vale,
The Messiah, we're gonna hail!
He don't sound funny; he looks like a honey
From what we've seen he's well worth the money...
And you know he's a class act, star quality Richie don't lack!

Just because we ain't double barrelled
Don't mean we haven't travelled far
To get to this bar!
Mix a few Vodka & Cokes dear, an play us what we want to hear
We're behavin like "Hens" - watchin Live Thru a Lens
You're scared of PV lay-dees?
You're thinking that they're all crazy?
But just like you, they're a bit mad too!

Wake up on Saturday morning
You normally feel like yawning
But not this weekend
We're seeing "Live thru a lens"
And now our families' suspicious
Because we ain't washed the dishes
Still a pile there, well we don't care!

The Road to Liverpool

Save me from drowning in Irish seas
In Liverpool we'll have our tea....
What a lovely Good Friday
There's plenty funny things to say

This little song should bring the sun
But it won't shine until we've sung
We'll shop and lunch and hit the streets
A real cool place for a PV meet....

All the wine we bought was Rose'
All I brought in me bag got broken
On the Road to Liverpool (yay...!)
Ev-er-y train leads to Lime Street
Nan trekked thru town on her two feet
And didn't get lost along the way!!!

Bomb bomb bomb baa daa dom bomb bomb
Bomb bomb bomb baa daa dom bomb bomb
Bomb bomb bomb baa daa dom bomb bomb
Bomb ba dom....

There's nothing left for us to drink
A bunch of alchies; you would think!
Sink cocktails down in Est Est Est
Their Peach Bellinis are the best!

We like to sleep in the Holiday Inn
After watching Robbie Sin Sin Sin
Look at our DVDs and cheer
Coz maybe then we'll drink more beer!

Every meet we've ever planned
Has been real great and turned out grand
More Port Vale meets are on the way
Ev-er-y time fun doesn't lack
We party hard and have great craic
And thats the way that it will stay!

Bomb bomb bomb baa daa dom bomb bomb
Bomb bomb bomb baa daa dom bomb bomb
Bomb bomb bomb baa daa dom bomb bomb
Bomb ba dom....

Save Pervy - drowning in fountains
We'll be doing the grape challenge
What a lovely Good Friday
Scrumptious will soon be on her way.....

Millennium

We've got trains directing our fate
And we're praying the plane wont be late
PV Meet Up.....

Some say that we are nutters
Some say that we are barmy
but we're the force behind the crazy Port Vale meet up army
Gotta drink it down... and not fall down

Run around on Thursday
Packing up our case and bag
We hope Friday comes round quickly
And this week it just don't drag
Then rise and shine;
Party like its '99....

Huh huh.... ha haa....

We've got trains directing our fate
And we're praying the plane wont be late
Cause we know it's a great social date
PV Meet Up....

We're going to see Tim sing live
With the R-W-E
We're going to Port Vale FC,
And sit in Robbie's seat
Some friends, they are all so cynical
Refuse to see the facts....
We're great mates, the Crew,  coz us girls have made a pact!

We've got trains directing our fate
And we're praying the plane wont be late
Cause we know it's a great social date
PV Meet Up....

Come and have a go if you think you can drink Vod-ka.....(X2)

PV Meet Up (X2)

We've got trains directing our fate
And we're praying the plane wont be late
Cause we know it's a great social date
PV Meet Up

And when we meet we always have a laugh
I often think we all were born right daft
Peas in a pod...we all get on mighty fine... (X2)

We've got trains directing our fate (PV Meet Up)
And we're praying the plane wont be late (PV Meet Up)
Cause we know it's a great social date (PV Meet Up)
PV Meet Up
PV Meet Up.....

And we won't stop!

Rena's Lovelight

What are you supposed to do?
You not going to Down Under...
You're off to Florida
And your nerves are starting to show
You'll be fine on the flight
Just don't stop to wonder....
A little voddy on the plane
Will make all the time just flow

[chorus]
And we wanna know
Rena, when you're with us...
What are you getting up to?
Making a lot of noise!
Turnin' your stereo up again
What will the neighbours think?
We all know what you're doing!
We know it's not house chores!
Turnin' your music up again

(You did it again, did it again)

Rena we're really sure,
You're a bleedin nutter!
Wouldn't have you any other way
We love the fun that you bring...
Lay-dee you're on the phone
Texting away to Paula
Do you think you're 2 peas in a pod?
You know damn well that we do...

[chorus]
And we wanna know
Rena, on your birthday
Will you be perving and droolin?
Over some Robbie pics
Back in the naked thread again
Or readin some tabloid mix?
Gettin all hot and steamy
Making you feel so warm
Back in the naked thread again

Rena don't turn Rob's music down
Coz we just know
At Port Vale you loved to dance around
Grapes; we need more
Coz the challenge ain't easy girl
But dunno what we can do
Cause we found
You'll beat us next time around!

Keep you shining... your lovelight
You did it again....
Keep you shining... your lovelight
You did it again....
Keep you shining... your lovelight
You did it again....
Keep you shining... your lovelight
You did it again....

And we wanna know
Rena, on your birthday
Will you be perving 'n' droolin?
Over some new Rob pics
Back in the naked thread again
Or readin some tabloid mix?
Gettin all hot and steamy
Making you feel so warm
Back in the naked thread again

Runcorn - are you Ready to be Crewed???

The Meet! July 2010

So we have a bacon butty, cuppa tea and Cary gets her lovely girls off to school. After a shower and change, we are feeling fresh a daisy (pffft after a 1 hour power nap!) and we are off and about. 1st stop - Spasda. Booze and bits and bobs for later. Whilst we're on B words we buy Berocca... and randomly throughout the day a chorus of "I'm so tall, I'm so tall, you raise me and then you let me fall" can be heard as we are singing away to the advert in the middle of the supermarket! As you do, like...!!

Next stop - Munchies. Time for a quick brew and to drop off the sleeping bags and blow up bed for later.. 

Next stop - school. Leavers assembly - how cute was the school. Ain't been in a primary school since... well.... since I was actually in primary school. Which was a while ago to say the least! OMG! lovely assembly it was too. 

Next stop - train station. If you have read any of our meets, you will know that the Crew spend a fair bit of time at airports, on the road or at a train station... this meet was no exception! Arriving at the station, we saw Paula, Louise and Shelley all waiting for us... how good was it that all the trains arrived on time - YIPPEEEE! Crew collected we head back to Cary's for a beverage... blessed as usual the sun decides to come out so we convene in the gar-ding for a catch up and a bevvie.

En-route is Kriss and no sooner do we say "where's Kinky?" and there she is, bouncing through the door and looking twice as lively!! So we are all here... nope wait - we are missing Munchie. 20 mins later and she is occurring with Janette who is one of the new Crew members... Cary puts on a fine feast of food... num nummmms... thanks a lot hun - muchos appreciated mate! Lots of laughs already; Paula gets a few pressies seeing as its her burfday (Happy Birthday tooo youuuuu!) but no cake yet... its a surprise... the cat was nearly let out of the bag though! Bottle of champers for Mand - just as a thank you from all us girls for putting us up and putting up with us - its a reet good afternoon!

Packing everything up at Cary's, we give her other half his house back - thanks for the hospitality Mal! Into the mini mini and Kriss's brum brum we scoot over to Munchies where we are no sooner in the door that the drink is flowing, the music is going and we are all discussing the evenings main event - JK as Robbie!

As more of Cary & Mandy's friends arrive, everyone gets to know each other... the great thing about us getting together is no matter who joins the Crew, they are made to feel welcome. Just look at Munchie - shes part of the furniture these days... and Kriss - first time meeting us madheads in Stoke and it was like she was always part of the team! So we welcome with open arms Janette, Susie, Trish and Ashlea - the Runcorn rabble!

Question - how do you make a Strawberry Daquari without a blender or mixer?

Take your strawberries, place em in a pint glass and mash them with a fork; add copious amounts of Bacardi and Strawberry liqueur aswell as a couple of dashes of Cranberry juice and mix... take your ice cubes and bash em like mad with big wooden chopping board, then add to pint glass, cover and shake, shake, shake, shake it baby...

Talk about improvising! Thankfully they tasted deelish and the Rose wine was soon replaced by a cocktail or two ;) With Take That on the telly (on the tellllly!) we get our gladrags on, straighten our hair (thanks to GHD) and arrange a couple of Joe le' Taxis to take us to the Quayside.

With a big balloon all ready to surprise the lovely JK as Robbie, we get a wriggle on and manage to get everyone and said balloon safely into taxis.

In our little convoy, the 3 cabs arrive at the Quayside and we all jump out of the cabs. Slowly and carefully we get the balloon out - its still in one piece and we're doing well. Before we head into the pub we decide on a couple of group photos for the album, the enlarged Crew in all its pink glory assemble for roll call outside and we harrass one of the regulars to take our pics.

See if you can spot the balloon?!?!

After safely getting the balloon to the venue, in and out of the taxi without popping it, Paula takes a little hop, skip and a bump into the window that was open - the POP was sooo loud it gave us all a right fright and the balloon was no more - sob!
We then start a chant of one of Robs classic live moments - "Alcohol - yeahhhh, Drugs - boooo, Alcohol - yeahhhhh, Drugs - boooooo, Alcohol - yeahhhhhh, Drugs - booooo, Alcodrugs - AHHHHHH!" Passers by really do think the entertainment has arrived earlier and have a little chuckle with us (not at us, that would be just rude PMSL!)

We head into the Quayside, but not before we meet the lovely Claire and Norman - part of the staff. They tell us that JK has left the building to go and get some food - so we try and act discreet. (I did say try!) I don't think they realise what they've let themselves in for tonight and with smiles all round we head in and make a bee-line for the bar - well why not!

After getting a whip going and taking a list of drinks (to which the barman says we are sooo organised - I reply that we are professionals, this is the PV Crew after all!!) we get our 1st round of the night and find a table and a couple of stools. As the DJ starts playing some reet good choonage, we ditch the stools and make some serious shapes on the dancefloor. It's not even 9pm and yet you would think we were in a club!

Paula is busting some serious moves and we all get up to join her... good times..

Before JK joins the stage, theres a local band on, they're not bad at all and we get our groove on with them. Time for a few more drinks and a few more pics before the main attraction is on stage. Now... we still hadn't told our favourite Robbie Williams tribute act JK (as Robbie) that we were in the building. We were sure at this point he knew or had seen us - but who knows... The DJ introduces JK and in he bounds.... to the start of Let Me Entertain You... and jumps on top of a table right in front of us.

The next minute went something like this...

"Hell has gone and heavens here, theres nothing left for you to fear, Shake your *puzzled look* *pause**points at us in a line*..... now scream! So come on Let Meeeee Entertain You...!!

*mouths "what are you doing here?"* 

As the gig went on, JK was his normal energetic self, the atmosphere in the place was unreal. Everyone was buzzing and of course us girls in Port Vale Crew were loving it. At this point, Trish and Janette said could not believe how good he was (as they hadn't seen JK before) and Ashlea was up bouncing with us madheads at the front! It was like we had never been away!

Throughout the set, JK worked with the audience - which he always does, giving shout-outs, birthday mentions and generally skitting the blokes that were sat quietly with their pints - reluctantly present, with their other half or family! It is also really nice to say that we got a couple of shout outs too. JK always puts on a good show and we never leave disappointed, but to get a little acknowledgement for travelling to see him is also most appreciated!

Before You Know Me, Cary got a mention about being on Loose Women with her lovely wabbit ears that Rob took a shine to - of course later in the evening a lady came up to Cary and said "were you really on Loose Women?" to which Curvy replied "yes I was" and the response was dismissive "Pffft!"

Actually no love, Cary makes everything up. Tis all lies ya know! You gotta larf!

A bit of Elvis and the older part of the audience are loving it  - as are the Crew... Then a bit of schwinggggg and the Crew are up, schwinggging... good time is being had by all! The audience are lapping it up and everyone is up dancing!

As usual the end of the show comes before we know it and the Crew are disappointed as are the rest of the crowd... we give shouts for more and true Robbie style, we get a little bit more in the encore; before JK disappears off the stage for photos!

We take ourselves over the other side of the room, nearer the door and some comfy sofas.
More drink? Yes please and as th DJ cranks up the choons we create our own dancefloor and start throwing a few shapes! Mixing dance with cheese, we get busy shaking our tail-feathers! Once JK has done the rounds with everyone, he decides to join the Crew for a little catch up and a few piccies! As always he's a complete sweetheart and spends some time getting to know the enlarged Crew and new members! Telling the Runcorn Rowdy Rabble that he'll back in true Arnie style when he visits the Quayside again in December.

A few more rounds of drinks and busting of moves takes place - well the night is still young! It finally gets to kicking out time however the lovely Norman invites us for a lock in at the back back bar... JK nips off to get changed and we head round to the other bar - but not before we say our farewells to a few of the Crew. It's been a big night and a mammoth session - and some of the girls have work tomorrow which is a pity. Raiding the kitty we sort out taxi fares, lots of hugs and snogs too (no tongues mind) and its goodbye from them. Mandy heads home and arranges to leave the keys under the wheel of the car...

So round at the back back bar, we settle in with a few more bevvies. JK joins us with a few of his friends who had been at the gig and we start a huge debate on the pros and cons of the Robbie rejoining Take That which hit the news that week - gawd the House of Commons had nuffink on us. Considering Cary and I had had very little sleep, we are hanging in there and would be giving the young 'uns down boom boom street a right run for their money! Paula, Kriss and Lou are also in high spirits  too and we start a few sing songs... "King of the Bongo Bong" for Den... and "Paula in a Campervan" paying respects to the new wheels that will be occurring in Leeds! JK looking a little confuddled at our title change is given a bit of a hard time in jest "call yourself a tribute mate!!!" PMSL!

Much more chatter... Chiplash.... Welsh Pounds... Gary Barlow..... Trafford Centre Loos... Shizer - you're not German, are you.... Crackin.... Take That tour Bus.... oh too many laughs to mention. Topic of conversation never too far away from the lovely Robbie Williams! Its just after 3 and we say our goodbyes to JK, lots of hugs of course, a cpl more pics and say thanks to the guys in the pub. What a night its been. Surprises, dancing, alcohol (yeah, drugs boooo) feathers, burst balloons, and a good ol helping of the Williams choonage with some great people!

We hop in our taxi / minibus and chattering commences. How we have the energy I will never know. Then, as if by magic, She's the One comes on the radio and we're off on a sing song! Poor taxi driver. Despite the copious amounts of alcohol drunk tonight there is still enough in the kitty for a taxi. Fantastic! We get back to Munchies and head to the car to find the keys... no keys.... hmmm so with phones for torchlight we start crawling around to try and locate the keys - looked like a bunch of pink feathers casing the joint!
Cary has a brainwave to try and look round the back and we are on to a winner!
Having a debrief around the kitchen table and a quick shuftee at the pics, we giggle and talk shizer for another 20minutes before admitting defeat and hitting the hay. Another quality night.

Next morning, Munchie is up and the kettle is on, the bacon is frying and she is the hostess with the mostess... num nums bacon butties and mugs of tea. No sauce for me thou (sauce phobia pmsl!) please Mand! What a night! We hear from the new Crew members that they enjoyed the craic with the Crew and they wanna know when the next one is! Time ticks on, trains home need to be caught and one by one Mandy's house empties... this is the sad bit. Until next time though ladies :)
Paula and I are left - Cary says she will take us uptown for a Subway (official food of the PV Crew) So we head for a munch and more chat.
Theres a sign outside that says "Grants for Workers" but in her post Crew haze, Cary glances and thinks it says "Grants for Wankers" and we start to laugh hysterically. Of course no one can figure out what we are laughing at and of course a few strange looks occur. Par for the course thou, you gotta have a few random laughs to get you through the day! We nip up to the Quayside for a swift half, Claire is working and she is feeling exhausted after the previous night! One of the lads comes through the bar and sees us and mutters something about feathers - oops - apparently he had to do a bit of cleaning that morning... sorry about that.
At the bar we pull up a pew and Claire is catching up on what we thought of the previous nights entertainment. Glancing behind the bar to see what time it is, we notice that the clock is a back to front and with the lack of sleep, throw in alcohol and the giddiness of the last few days we dont need much to make us more confuddled! At that point we all look at our watches to be on the safe side and realise its time to make like a banana and split. Cary's mini mini drives itself back to the train station as we say goodbye to Paula. And then there were 2 of the Crew. Before my flight theres time for dinner back at Cary's and more chatter from last nights schnanigans! Thank you Cary (and family) for looking after me that weekend; dinner from Smilers was lovely and door to door service to the airport was fab! Much appreciated!

So that was the weekend that Runcorn got Crewed. JK was bloody brilliant as usual and no doubt we will be seeing JK again in his One Night of Robbie Williams show in the future. Surprises galore and of course lots and lots of laughs.
Here's to the next one, with some of the new Crew and more music from the lovely Robbie Williams!

Surpriiiiise! Runcorn gets Crewed!

Day after Soccer Aid.... we've got the post meet blues. You can imagine - OK may be you can't, sothink Women with PMT, no chocolate, no alcohol and no pics of their favourite man (whomever that may be) to perve over... We were in bad shape. So... when Cary messages us with a "who wants to come to Runcorn to see JK as Robbie" message we all start thinking.... and smiling....


Sat in Liverpool Airport on my way home, I was comtemplating how am I gonna get there on a Friday?!?!

As the days passed and we got back on with our day to day lives (snooze), the plans started to form nicely. Mandy offered to help with Cary with accommodation for us rabble... trains are booked... training is rescheduled by yours truly so planes can be booked... All is well in PV Crew land. Cary is on ticket duty and she calls venue - no reply. She calls their mobile - no reply. She goes down to the venue - closed till later! Aaaaggghh who would have thought ticket stress would occur for a boozer! She's on it like a car bonnet though and later that day Cary checks in with the good news - tickets booked and also for some of her & Mandy's friends too. Nice. However, like with most of our dooos, not all of the crew can make it but Rena and Debs were certainly there in spirit - mostly VODKA!!!
Anyhoo, where was I? Vodka always distracts me... Oh yeah. The Meet Up. So it was decided that we would try and keep it a surprise from the bloke we were going to see - JK (as Robbie). And for 6 whole weeks we said nothing, man that was a tough challenge... we couldn't even do the "5 more sleeps, 4 more sleeps, 3 MORE SLEEPS...." countdown on our pages. So quietly we planned and it all came together! The night before the meet, I was all packed and ready to go to the airport. Making a quick pit stop to Chez Lancs to collect the rest of my stuff, I had a sneaky peek online to see all the excitement building with the news that Robbie & Take That were getting back together! The girls were online as was JK... who posted on his page that he was being interviewed by a number of radio stations later that evening about the reunion. Unfortunately I wasnt able to listen in as was on a plane to Liverpool to meet the lovely Cary who was putting me up (and putting up with me) for the evening!!

I knew it was gonna be a pain in the arse when I got to the hairyport shop (which in Cork is one shop, this ain't Manchester or Heathrow ya-know!) and there was NO Mickey Finns Butterscotch. None. Nada. Zip. Shocking I tell ya....what about the Cocksucking Cowboys - what a libertyyy!

Anyhoo after getting over the sheer shock of that I got myself a Pear Bulmers and checked out the departure board. DELAYED. WTF?? Told you it was gonna be a pain in the arse... Waited and waited for an update, feeling awful that I was keeping my mate waiting at the other end.

Eventually, 90mins late, we set off and I was pleased to see the River Mersey beneath me as I knew I was nearly at my destination. Cary was waiting for me in Arrivals and after a MAHOOSIVE hug, we set off in the Mini (mini) to Cary's gaff.

Lovely home she's got there... and was made to feel welcome from the minute I set foot in the door. With a glass of vino (or two) on the go, we had a reet good catch up and discussed plans for tomorrow. In fact we discussed so much we drank all the wine... Mal sneaked down for a quick hello and a glass before heading back to bed so that we could keep gossiping. Which is what we did. After the wine, we started on the Baileys... as you do loike.... and then looking outside we noticed it was starting to get light! Oops! Was that the time?? Amidst all the gossiping, there were a few Take That vids, lots of Robbie vids (well would be rude not too!), a peek at the hanimals in the garden and a run down the road to see the bus stop at 4.30am (don't ask!)

There was a rumbling from upstairs and checking the time, we noticed that the kids would be getting up for school any minute (well, round about now - actually!) and so to the kitchen we went for a brew and Cary got the brekkie on...more to follow.....

Old Trafford... Soccer Aid... Let's 'Ave It!

So... up and at em on the Sunday... well some were more "at em" than others. My days. My head was down Boom Boom Street I can tell you.
Call in Doctor Pullen, Medicine Woman, with some pain relief (thanks hun!)
Spot of brekkie, we had juice with the glasses this time - it was a revelation! However cups with no coffee is just as good LOL!

Packing up was - well - interesting... so much extra stuff, I tell you what, I always have more going home after a PV Crew Do than when I started....and then transporting the drink to Manchester, honestly walking down the stairs in the George we sounded like a couple of winos with all the bottles!

Check out, quick chat to the receptionist and we are off... this is a bit that I dont like - saying g'bye. Cary and Mandy head off in the mini mini and Kriss says she will drop Shelley at the train station. Rena and Paula hop in one car, like Thelma and Louise and Kriss takes Louise and I who... well aren't like Thelma and Louise coz there's 3 of us! (kinda Thelma and Louise... and Louise!!)

Anyhoo we hit the minty highway and we are off to Manchester... to Soccer Aid! Debs texts, shes on the train and en-route. Again everything is going to plan. Perfick. The receptionist from the apartment calls and after a bit of sweet talking, says we can check in 3 hours early. Gotta love that, means we can get ready for the footie and chill a while. We arrive in Manchester making great time, in the motor there was lots of singing occuring and a fab version of Good Doctor (coz I can get that at Booooots.... do do do do do do doooooh!) Pull up at the Printworks; out of the car come the winos again... *chink chink* go the bottles! We locate the apartment, get the key & head for the lift. Floor 5; the Penthouse. Nice. PV Crew Penthouse.

2 bed, split level pad, with flat screen TV, DVD, ipod dock, mahooosive fridge for all the booze, nice fluffy towels, brew stuff (well needed, 1st job was ta put the kettle on!) nice toastie loaf...
Paula goes off in search of crumpets... comes back empty handed. WOUNDED. Debs calls and says shes at the tram stop... just round the corner! YAY! So within a few minutes we are all together and hugs all round. A quick freshen up, Electric Proms on the DVD (shhh don't ask where we got it ;) ) and fast voddy. Debs is catching up with all the goss from yesterday - we missed ya Debs!
Thanks for the Taboo Rena, that was the job after Saturday for me. ( had enough Voddy then lol!)

Trying to decide on the scran - hmmm let me see.... Subway? Paula and Lou head off with orders and change in hand and the rest of us finish getting ready. PV Crew strip - check. Black & Gold boas - check. Halo (halo halo) - check. Soccer Aid Match tickets - check. Camera - check. So we get our munch on and get the flock out of there...not before we fill up our Buxton Spring with a secret ingredient ;) and head towards Old Trafford/// Theatre of Dreams... and Soccer Aid 2010.
On the Metrolink, the nice Metrolink man holds the doors and lets us on for the 1st part of our journey for free. We change trams and get on the packed one heading up to Old Trafford. A couple of blokes on the tram read our shirts front and back and have a little chuckle at our names. Bless em! As we get off at Old Trafford, we start walking towards Sir Matt Busby Way.
Like a match day, the street is adorned with sellers and vendors of fast food and dodgy merchendise! The kids are loving the tooters (as is Paula!) and the flags (of which Debs buys one!) and theres a real party atmosphere. We decide to head up to the tunnel end of the stadium to try and see the coaches coming in and the place is packed. So we join the crowd and start to make friends. A lovely couple aged 65 who were celebrating their birthdays were in Manchester for a treat and they were enjoying the spirit of the day! So we were able to get closer to the front but we were not quite there... still we had a good view.
So we waited... and waited.... there was quite a crowd. JK called to say that he was on the train with friends and the said packed train all decided to sing Angels to him - brilliant! We agreed to meet him in the Trafford Bar, just to be sociable like... you know how it is.
Just before the England coach arrived, an Endemol Researcher came across to our direction asking who would be interviewed and who knew a lot about the teams etc... Lots of hands went up in the air including mine but as I wasn't on the front I didn't hold much hope. With nowt to lose, I raised my voice and said "I'd love to, I've come from Ireland to support England so why not".
Attention was grabbed (nothing to do with the daft halo on my head!) and he asked the others to let me through to the front. Result.

Louise was right behind me and the girls to the right of her; you can just see them all on the clip if you look before the camera pans to Kirsty (Gallagher, who was lovely BTW) So my 30seconds of fame, was a right laugh! "We're massive Robbie fans, so of course we're here to see Robbie" I said, and then spoke about a couple of footballers to look like I knew what I was on about! pmsl! Upon signing the disclaimer to say I was ok to go out on telly, the description of me was "Girl with halo on her head"... see I told you it was the halo!
Before we knew it, the coach was pulling up and the team started getting off. My word, Pete wasn't wrong when he said that Rob had been working hard for the match. He was looking great and was very fitting for him to lead the team off the coach. One by one the footballers and celebs left the coach, to huge cheers and applause. Their suits cut them a fine figure ('cept for Ricky Riiicky Hatton, bless him!)

Lots of pics and shouting occured, there was a right buzz. As the team went into the ground, we decided to go for a pit stop before the match and headed up to the Trafford Bar to use the facilities and stock up on liquid refreshment. Outside the bar, JK was already there with some friends (lovely girls from near his hometown and Paul & his girlfriend from the night before). Paula wasted no time in getting the banner out and lots more signings occurred. Singing Happy Birthday to this lad who was celebrating his 21st - another random gets Crewed! Love it!

JK also signed the banner, after all there was part of it dedicated to him... and to ensure that he was fully part of the Crew he was presented with his PV Crew strip...to be fair he played the game and put it on. Sound.

We sup up, and head up to the Theatre (of Dreams) to take our seats and soak up the atmosphere. Stopping at the bar, we discover no Bud, no Magners, no wine... only Stella. OH and they have pies - but we're not hungry yet. Stella it is then!

Front row near the corner flag by the Stretford End. Get the banner hung with me ribbon (gucci dont ya know, nothings too good for the Crew!) and we settle in for the match. The teams get a run out before they line up. Rob is on the pitch, in the middle and as we look up we see him coming our way... and he's coming over... and he's nearly in the corner! We were all so shocked we forgot the snaps and by the time we get one he was heading the other way.... *sigh* Kick off - the game gets under way. Rena jokes with JK that 3 is the magic number and she only has eyes for those legs!

England are being put under pressure by the ROW and lucky for us, Rob is on the left wing and is up and down our touchline like a yoyo... not that we are complaining. Ben Shephard is having a good game, a few hard tackles come Jonny's way. Shearer and Sheringham are looking like the SAS task force of all those years ago... Redknapp on form too.. it's a good game so far. England edge it at half time 1-0. We are hoping it's gonna be third time lucky for England at Soccer Aid... Debs and Paula get some munchies... we have a squizz at our pics so far. Not bad. Plenty of talent.
Nipping to the bar, we find that they now have Magners back in stock, but are now out of food of any description.. and we are now hungry! Bugger. Oh well, Magners it will have to be then!
2nd half and what a half it was. Rob went off. Jonny Wilkes is still going hell for leather. The ex-pros are giving it their all... Olly Murs played a blinder. Ready Steady Teddy scored and ran straight to us... along with Shephard, Shearer and Olly Olly Olly...That was a sight for sore eyes I can tell you! Top totty!

We came up with a new anthem for this trip... Think I'm a Celebrity - Get Me Out of Here!!
"Olly Olly Olly, Tits in the Trolley, Me mums in the Biscuit tin" PMSL Pervy quality lyrics. Who started that one off girls?

Debs is loving the view, as is Kriss. Lou is snap snap snap happy. Rena and I are still laughing at Paula's lyrics and JK is wondering what he's gotten himself into...!

The match goes to 2-2. Final whistle and we are into penalties. Overall not a bad game for a supporter to watch and the true winners of the evening - Unicef with the money that was raised. Superb.
Notice I'm going with the positives first. England got beat on sudden death penalties... not before Jamie Theakston making a few class saves. What a game! Even if the result didn't go England's way, the right result of over 2million raised on the night was all that mattered. Excellent! It was great to read that so many people also gave their services for free, including the call centre (who often get bad press for their service) who manned the phones to take donations...

Making our way out of the ground, stopping for a quick Scooby Snack, we tuck in and enjoy. The day had been excellent, and with lots of things that the Crew enjoy. Laughs being the main one. Rob being another...
Trafford Bar closed - whats that about? So we head across the street to the Bishops Blaize. For those of you that don't know, on a home match day, this is packed to the rafters with hard-core Man U supporters... and their chants and songs are always in full flow. So after scoring a table and a few drinks, we decide to start a sing song.
Kriss decides now is a good time to plonk her feathers on her head and much amusement follows! We start off with Let Me Entertain You. Just us. 6 of us. JK is having a night off and chatting to Paul and the others...
We then move on to Rudebox. Paula is in her element. Still just us.
The 2 couples on the table behind ask us to sing another, and their lads start to join in....
Rock DJ is next. This is where it gets interesting.... we start it off... then the table behind us... then the girls next to us... then the couples down the stairs... then the lads at the bar... all singing Rock DJ! Brilliant!
Footie songs next and everyone is in great form - except for the Bar Manager who reminds us its kicking out time...
GRRR! Pop outside for a chat to JK and his buddies.. plastic glasses are ace ;)
Get a taxi number and call for a minibus so the 6 of us can head back to the PV Penthouse. Tired but happy, we say our goodbyes to everyone. Hugs all round and we tell JK that Stoke was brilliant (again) and that we had a great time at the match.
Into the minibus we go (was defo a minibus this time and not a limo!) and head back where we stick on "And Thru it All" - voddy and Cocksucking Cowboys on the go and Debs and Pineson get stuck into the Smurf-noff! What was going to be a quick drink turns into another 3.30am finish. Wouldn't have changed it for the world though, too little time throughout the year spent with you guys so need to cram in as much as possible when we get the chance.

So that was it. Fab footie. Lots of Robbie. Meeting Pete. JK was in great form. The theatre was great. Limos, champagne and general merriment. But most importantly, you girls. Simply the Best x

Stoke gets Crewed!

I left Cork bound for my flight to Birmingham, looking forward to the weekend. Since meeting Jonny Wilkes after his show in Bristol in October, the girls and I waited patiently for news of Soccer Aid to be released into the public domain and to try and secure tickets… so as soon as I heard they were on sale, we bagged ourselves a couple on the front row. Sweet.

The girls were all en-route. If you’re meeting us for the 1st time – hellllo! We come from all over the place. To give you an idea, we are talking: London, Leeds, Norfolk, Port Talbot, Runcorn, Rutland, Stafford and finally Cork in Ireland. Meets are often difficult to arrange where everyone can go due to travel, timing, kids etc so this one was extra special as everyone would be on board the party train at some point during the weekend. So here I introduce Randy Rena, Dirty Debbss, Kinky Kriss, Lusty Lou, Pervy Paula, Shexy Shelley, Curvy Cary, Minxy Mandy and me, Scrumptious Sam.

The Meet...
Meeting at Stoke train station was a breeze. For once, trains were on time for everyone; and despite my half hour delay (cheers Aer Fungus!) I managed to get the time back somehow. Shelley, Kriss and Paula were already at the station and we said we would wait on for Louise to occur an hour later! Kriss kindly offered to give us a spin in her batmobile to the hotel, where Cary, Mandy and Rena had already landed. The George Hotel is ace. It’s like faulty towers, but it’s our Faulty Towers and we love it. There is always a warm welcome and a brekkie in the morning (juice but no glasses!) and it’s across the road from the Red Lion – a regular haunt of ours when in town.

Popping to Subway to get a sarnie (Subway – the official food of the PV Crew!) and downing a swift half passed the time… Louise was here and with a “Whatssss Occuringggg” shouted across the road we were off and on our way.

At The George, there were hugs a plenty. That’s the thing with the Crew, you wouldn’t think that we had not seen each other for the last 6 months or so. There’s never an awkward silence when the Crew are in town! Sorting the rooms, we headed upstairs to unpack. As per usual the bar was set up 1st, well it wouldn’t be a PV Crew Party without our sponsors!

Swapping gifts, hugs, and t-shirts; whilst having a cheeky drink we got into our Laydee Lympics tops and head for the Red Lion. Home colours of course - Black & Gold seeing as we are in Burslem!

Grapes for Kriss, Cary and Mandy… and Bob’s Bingo was on the cards for everyone where we were playing for the deep fat frierrrr and the sodaaaa stream! (and a few Robbie goodies of course!) Ordering a round in, we were sure to get ice in that duck! The barman thinks we are a little bit nuts! Spooky that “And Through it All” is playing on the telly so we ask the nice barman to replay the DVD and he’s happy to indulge us… I had arranged for a few Port Vale bits and bobs to be sent to the hotel from Port Vale FC (Thanks Andy in the Club Shop!) so the PV Crew could have their very own pens and badges! The whirlwind that are the PV Crew swept through the pub, and getting a few more signings on the banner we headed back to the hotel after an hour so we could get ready for our night at the theatre….! The “minibus” was collecting us at 6.15 so we had to get a move on.

Now when I say minibus that’s what I told the girls. In reality I ordered a platinum limo so we could arrive at the Regent Theatre in style, along with 2 bottles of champers to get us in the party mood! Imagine when Shelley and Kriss went outside the hotel and tried to hop in an actual minibus that was parked over the road… PMSL! Only to then see the limo at the side of the hotel… I could hear them shrieking and laughing upstairs in the room! Classic! All into our dresses, I look at my friends and see we scrubbed up really well.

So we are in the limo and on our way… I’ve Got a Feeling; that tonights gonna be a good night! Arriving at the Regent, a number of heads turned as the limo pulled up. Needless to say as us rabble piled out they realize it’s not the VIPs they thought LOL! Heading into the Regent we take a couple of pics, score a drink at the bar (4.70 for a wine – what are you thinking people?) and head in to take our seats. The place was packed and everyone was in good spirits.

As the band started, we knew we were not going to be in our seats for long… standing up, cheering, clapping, “one hand in the air-ing”, bouncing… all part of the show. Well it was for us. Paula decided to stay in the aisle seat and of course when Rudebox came on, the shoes were OFF and she was busting a move or two! 99% of the people in the theatre were up and participating – sure that’s what Rob’s music is all about! You always get the odd one though who refrains and that’s cool as long as they don’t expect us to refrain with them! If you want to read a full review of the show, check out my last post HERE!

and if you are thinking of going to see it,  DO - becauseyou won’t be disappointed.

Later than scheduled (because JK was staying up on that stage for the whole night!) we head out of the theatre and decide on our plans for the rest of the evening. Well the night was still young…

I spotted a bar across the street, tables outside and a chippy opposite. PERFECT. Chips and alcohol. Just what we needed. Heading across the street and straight for a couple of empty seats, we rested our weary tootsies and took turns to get food. Who would’ve thought a night at the theatre would have been so exhausting!

Inside we pop to get a round of drinks and we settle on a table outside to set up camp! On the table next to us, there’s a friendly looking older guy with glasses. A couple of the Crew are asking each other if it’s Pete Conway, Rob’s dad… We can’t decide and are too shy to ask directly. Yes that’s right, we are shy and retiring types us lot!

As Pete gets up to leave with his friend, who is smartly dressed in a suit, I shout “See ya Pete” down the street – at which point he turns around, looks at us and replies “I’m coming back in a minute!”
So that settles that, it’s either a guy called Pete who looks like Rob’s dad or it’s a guy called Pete who is Rob’s dad… Upon his return we found out he was the latter. And what a gentleman he was. Not wanting to intrude on his social time, we asked was it ok to chat for a while and Pete agreed. Asking us what brought us to town, we told him about the show, and about the Port Vale Crew… How we got together, why we got together, our travels etc. We said that it was his son’s fault and he laughed! Pete is happy to chat about footie, cricket, Britain’s Got Talent, Wales, Stoke and the show we had all just seen. We ask him is he off to Soccer Aid and he replies that he was going to watch it on the telly, but that Rob had been taking it seriously and has been training for 4 weeks. The following day when we saw Rob getting off the coach tanned and in great shape, we knew that Pete was telling the truth!

Pete’s friend, “Herbie” I think his name was, was also a gent. He soon got into the swing of things with the Crew and was a right larf… took a bit of persuading to get him to lend Paula his jacket mind you, but eventually we were on to a winner! Pete is stood in the street at this point, and when we look up, we see JK running towards the pub from the theatre. Pete threw open his arms to gesture to JK and they gave each other a right big bear hug. Now if you hadn’t been aware of the show that night, it was a proper double take moment as from afar it looked like Pete and Rob together!

“My 2nd son” Pete says to JK and everybody laughs. At this point the pub is pretty crowded and a good time is being had by all! It’s been roughly 2 hours since the show, and there’s a great buzz around. Pete is still there chatting away and Herbie is getting to know the crew better too. We stop to chat to a Police Sergeant patrolling the area and nab him for a quick photo… ‘ello ‘ello ‘ello what do we have here?!? Thankfully he didn’t arrest us; well we are good girls, honest!
Pete and Herbie say their goodbyes but not before posing for a couple of pics with us lot. It was really lovely to meet them both and a pair of gents they were… The pub was closing, but in true PV Crew form we scored a lock in and headed inside with JK, the band, and some friends of the group. Sitting round the table, we reviewed the evening’s antics so far, chattering about the show and laughing at what had just happened outside. Lots of cameras around snapping pics, JK settled in for a few snaps too… Rosie and Jim… Hear the Drummer get Wicked… too many laughs to mention.
Calling it a night just after 3, a minibus was ordered to take us back to The George… where upon arrival a couple of us think that Cocksucking Cowboys were in order and carried on with a few shots before hitting the hay. Just another ordinary Saturday night in Stoke for the girls!